It was a wet and rainy weekend. There were puddles of mud and crashes of thunder and lightning.
The phone started to ring, so I picked it up and answered it. “Hi who is it”I said.
“It’s me Alice” my friend replied “I saw this haunted house on the internet” “Do ya wanna go check it out?
I was scared but I said yes. I went and put on my turquoise feather lined coat and walked to my friends’ place.
When I arrived, I knocked on the door and almost immediately I heard foot steps running towards the me. The door swung open and Alice stood before me ready to go. Together we
walked vigorously to the haunted house.
The house was made out of old rotting timber. Cracked black windows hid the horrors that were lurking inside. Feeling brave Alice and I slowly stepped through the door. Suddenly a huge and hairy black spider fell off my shoulder and dropped to the floor. It took me a while to realise that the piercing scream that echoed off the walls had come out of my own mouth.
The furniture was covered in heavy, fluffy spider webs, there wasn’t a single speck of furniture that wasn’t covered. Like a movie camera on zoom, I closely examined the room. After a minute or two I realised that everything in that house was just a prop!
Alice and I left the house with relief.
It would be nice to get some feedback:) !
ReplyDeleteYour desciptive writing was great! I could pictue the house as I read. The ending was surprising.
ReplyDeleteHi Angela, I enjoyed reading your story. That turquoise feather lined coat sounds just the thing I'd enjoy wearing. Great language you used. good for you.
ReplyDeleteMrs D
Hi Mrs Dunbier
Deletethankyou for your feedback we all miss you!
Hey Angela. I just finish reading your story and I LOVED IT. Keep up the Godd Work. You'll get there someday. AWESOME WORK!
ReplyDeleteHi Angela
ReplyDeletei really love your story. i also love those words maybe someday you would become come an author but for writing about nightmare stories. keep up the good work Angela
Anna